When Michael put his hand on my shoulder it startled me, I turned around and looked at him with tears in my eyes. I wiped my face with my hands to try and clean my face, trying to hide my tears which were now obvious. I wasn't embarrassed, but boys aren't supposed to cry. "Why Michael, why! Now I'm a boy that lives on the streets, no home, no family. God asks us to forgive, but I can't. I know mistakes happen, but to take someone's life? I'm a kid that's had to grow up too quickly, I've made the ultimate sacrifice, but without a cause." I sobbed again. Crying like a baby didn't seem to matter. I leaned into Michael for comfort. I don't know why, but right then I needed someone and Michael was the only one around.
"So what do you wanna do, kiddo? A leisurely stroll through the clouds, flying lessons. We could go and frighten the pigeons, get them back for all the poop they've dropped on us," he said laughing.
I couldn't help but giggle at his comments. I said I was just going to hang around, no pun intended. I went back to the park and sat on one of the benches, just staring into space with no idea what I was going to do now.
After sitting for some time, I saw Jake walking towards me with a woman I hadn't seen before. "Hi, Jake, where's the battleaxe?"
He made sure the woman wasn't near enough to see him talking to himself and explained. "Mom fired her. I asked to go to the park and she refused, saying she would never take her little brat any where near the park again. When she tried to explain to mom about hearing voices, my mom threatened to call the police and have her locked up. She told her she was a wacko and didn't want her anywhere near me or my family. That's Ann, the new housekeeper, she's cool. He was going to high five but remembered hitting fresh air would be stupid, so he just said thanks. Ann's going to take me to the funfair and go on some of the rides with me. She's so cool!" As he said that, the housekeeper called, telling him it was time to go. He looked at me, smiled, said "Thanks, again" then he was gone.
I sat there a little longer . . . bored. I then thought of Rose, so I went to her house. When I got there the house was empty. I went round the back to see if the elephant was there. No dog, so I just sat on the grass waiting for something to happen. Of course when you want something to happen . . . well you know what I mean.
Time doesn't seem to exist as a ghost. Well, it doesn't feel like it. However long I waited, it was boring. Let's just say that some time later their car drove up to the house and they all got out. I waited till they'd all got out of the car before I walked up to the side of the house. Rose saw me and shouted, "Hello," then came to where I was standing. "Hi," she said, "We just had 'Tiny' to the vets. Mom said she wanted to get him checked out after yesterday." I laughed.
"You wanna go to the park?"
"I don't think so. How about we play in the back near the bottom of the garden?"
"If I get any more strange looks I'll start believing I'm dead." At that we both had a giggle. "So why don't you like going to the park?"
"Not now, David, please. It's a long story and it's really painful."
"I'm sorry I didn't mean to make you sad." Then looked down at my feet.
"So what do you want to play?"
"We could play tag, but I don't think you'll win." She instinctively slapped me, said sorry, then realized that you can't hit a ghost. I burst out laughing. Rose then gave me a stern face which made me laugh even more.
"Kids," she said, then walked off in disgust.
"Don't go." I said. You know how your mom was always right? Well, so are girls, and my laughing didn't help, but I couldn't help myself. Well at least the dog still likes me. "Don't you boy?" As if reading my mind, she called Tiny indoors. Girls! Sometime later, Daddy came out and sat on a lounger to relax. Seconds later, the elephant came back outside. I should really call him by his name, but with me being small for my age made him look like an elephant. Tiny came rushing over to where I was and again dropped down on my feet, I didn't yell this time. I'd started patting his head when Daddy looked across. He shook his head, whispering to himself that he was going to get that dog a straight jacket. Rose came out and laughed when she saw Tiny moving his head upwards as I patted him. She walked over to the dog and gave him a tickle under the chin. She asked her dad if she could take Tiny to the park. Dad looked at Rose.
"You said that you didn't like going to the park after the accident?"
"Dad!"
"Okay, but take him on his lead."
"Thanks, Dad." She got his lead, put it on him, and was gone before you could say 'boo' to a ghost. I followed Rose through the side gate and down the street then onto the main road that led to the park.
"Your dad talks funny!! I know Americans and Canadians and he doesn't talk like any of them."
"My dad doesn't talk funny. He's from Ireland."
"I didn't mean to be rude, I was just asking as you don't talk the same as your dad?"
"My dad emigrated here from Belfast, Ireland before I was born. I'm ten on May 23rd."
"It was my birthday a few weeks ago, I would have been twelve." Nothing was said until we got to the park and Tiny was let loose. "Michael took me to see my headstone so I'd stop complaining, I think. It hurt bad."
"I took you so you'd know that there's no going back," Michael said.
"Hey! Stop listening in on private conversations."
"Blah, Blah Blah. As though I have a choice." Rose just stood there, probably thinking I'd gone nuts talking to myself.
"I was talking to Michael. He's supposed to be my GUARDIAN ANGEL."
"I heard that!"
"Butt out Michael. All he does is make things harder." Changing the subject so as not to get any more grief. "What accident was your dad talking about at the park?" Rose seemed to ignore me for what seemed an eternity.
"My brother was over there by the lake. He ran onto the ice to get a football that had been kicked. The ice was too thin and broke under him. They got him out, but couldn't revive him. Hypothermia was what killed him."
"I'm sorry." For the second time that day I had made her sad. I felt like a heel.
"That's why I don't like going to the park. Whenever I come here I . . . sorry," she said as a tear rolled down her cheek. "He was always there. When I had to go to the shops he would always come with me, even if he was doing other things. If you'd met him, you would've liked him." Tiny came back and lay at Rose's feet panting. "We'd better get back before they start to worry?" Little was said on the way home, but she was hurting . . . bad. When we got back I said I needed to go, she was upset but I needed to do something.
"I'll be here tomorrow. It's Monday, so you'll be at school, but I'll see you after, I promise. Bye, Roseanne."
"Rose!!" She screamed. I think she would have tried to hit me again if I were any closer. "I'll get you," she said.
"What will you do, kiss me to death?" Then I was gone. Better to go before she thinks of a way to get even.
I disappeared, went to the park and sat down on my usual bench. "Michael. Michael, Can't you take the hurt away. You can do that, can't you?"
"I can't. The boss won't let me do that. Remember, you're in limbo."
"Tell me about him Michael. At least do that. I wish I could help, stop her from being sad. I didn't know about her brother. Please, Michael!!"
"You're going to get me into trouble. He was 12 when he had his accident. He went to St. John's secondary school. He liked hockey and was expected to achieve his goal and turn professional. After he died, his parents split up for awhile . . . grief is painful. When you die your troubles are over, unless you go to hell. The ones that are left behind are the ones who suffer. They have to go through the agony of losing someone."
"I've been selfish, haven't I? I'm sorry, Michael." I put my head in my hands and sighed. Michael sat beside me and held me.
"Things will work out, you'll see. There will be good times and bad times, but you'll get through them. You're a good one, David. And you've always got me to pick on!" Then laughed.
"Thanks, Michael. I want to help Rose and her family, let me do that please. I'll stay as I am, but please tell me how I can help them? If I was still living, I'd have Rose and her family as friends. It's wrong to let them suffer . . . that's cruel." That said, Michael said he had to go help another soul. "Thanks for listening, Michael."
I walked in the park till the sun came up. I looked out onto the lake. How can something so beautiful cause such heartache. The park had a picnic area right near the lake. The trees stood high above everything else. I walked through the trees and saw pathways that stretched as far as the eye could see. You looked across the water and the views were spectacular. I wished that my mom and dad could see what I was seeing. That thought didn't help much. Was I being selfish, thinking about myself, not thinking what my parents must have gone through. "Mom, Dad, I know you can't hear me, but I'm okay. I love you. Please forgive me, Mom. I didn't mean to hurt you, really."
Again it was daylight when I . . . well, woke up I suppose. I went over to the lake and tried to paddle, silly me. Well, at least I didn't have to worry about getting wet. That thought tickled me and I had a giggle. I trekked through the park till I got bored, then followed my nose back into town. Mmmm pizza! Later, as promised, I went back to see Rose. Tiny was playing with a ball when he saw me. He jumped on me - don't be silly, how can he knock me down?? I stood astride him, tickling his ears. His neck stretched so far I thought he'd grown another foot. Rose came outside, "Hi, David!"
"Rose, who are you talking to?"
"I told you, Dad, David!" She said, getting frustrated.
"I've got some good news for you. I took your mother to the doctor today, as you know, she's been sick lately. What about a little brother or sister?"
"Dad, don't say that, not even in fun."
"Rose, your mother is going to have a baby!" I don't know who was more shocked, Rose or me. She dropped to her knees.
"Nice one, Dad!!"
"Pardon? Who said that??"
"Bloody Hell! He heard me." Daddy looked around shell shocked.
"David!! Was that David??"
"Dad, you can't say anything. Don't tell Mom."
"If I tell your mother, she'll have me locked up." Rose told her dad about me, how she met me and where.
"David, what happened to you for you to die so young? Eleven is no age to die. I'm sorry, son, I shouldn't have asked that, that was cruel."
"Thank you, Michael. Thank you."
"Michael??"
"Michael is the Angel watching over me. I asked him if he could try and stop your pain. He told me what happened before and after your son died. When I died I was being selfish by just thinking about what had happened to me. But he told me once you die your troubles end. Those we leave behind are the ones who suffer. So I asked Michael to help. Michael is the hero though, not me." With that, I disappeared, happy. I felt light, as if a burden had been lifted. I can't describe it, but it felt good.
I went back to the lake, walked to the middle and shouted "Thank you, God, thank you." I learned a hard lesson, but it was true. God does help those who help themselves.
This ghost went to sleep, believe me???
To Be Continued....